Orig posted April 8, 2012
We believe everyone should have a good marriage book or two and we will add a few of our own to our resource page. As a couple, you should even have one for the woman, and one for the man, that really feeds their soul. If you don’t like to read, find a good YouTube video, or DVD to watch. But every now and then, we believe you all should be nurturing your marriage by adding to it a little pertinent wisdom.
It’s titled:
The Proper Care And Feeding of Marriage, By Dr Laura Schlessinger.
Dr. Schlessinger has a really nice radio show. She actually took a poll in her book from husbands asking them for wise advice regarding their wives. Now, now, …women…don’t get offended!
But we thought it was interesting to know this, since we believe women often set the tone and the temperature for the home.
Take heed of the awesome information she received from these awesome interviews:
What do you, as a man, most admire about WOMEN in general?
1. Social skills, nurturing nature, compassion, sensitivity, listening skills, focus on relationships and bonding – (family community).
2. Physical softness, sexy, curvy, beautiful and graceful bodies.
3. They will sacrifice for family, the power of creation of new life, being mothers.
4. Better at details, (multitasking).
5. They take the rough hard edges of this world they bring feelings and emotions and sense of intimacy to us logical guys.
6. They can create a home out of any environment adding and aesthetics, to life, ( color, grace, beauty ) they make a house into a sanctuary… a home, homemaking.
7. The positive effect a good woman can have on her husband and family.
8. In femininity there is gentle power over people.
What do you least admire about women in general?
1. Emotional manipulation, complaining, nagging, controlling through ” hurt “or “anger ” their ability to verbally rip apart your soul having always to have their way.
2. Moodiness, women initially express anger with slamming doors, pouting, and such, and it takes time to find out the root of the matter, (bossy or superior) attitude.
3. Gossip for sense of superiority, can’t fight with girlfriends and female relatives.
4. They want to talk everything to death, often without coming to any conclusions without the intent to actually solve anything.
5 . Emotions dominate rationality or truth.
6. Constant demand for validation, take everything too personally, obsessed with looks, (but not for sake of pleasing husbands.)
7. Unable to apologize to a man, stay angry and hold grudges a long time, shrillness & fault-finding.
8. Inability or unwillingness to understand what a man is, man hating tendencies not letting the man in their life be a man too quickly annoyed with the true nature of a man.
( Jennifer ) : Hmmm… thought it was so insightful to see that women can affect the mood of the entire home and family, and it’s also interesting to note care for our bodies and our sensitivity is highly admired. I also thought it was interesting for women to be considerate of what it means to be a man. Some men have hardships unbeknownst to women, and in a very different way. For instance, a man who is seeking to find a job, but having no luck really needs more affirmation about what he is doing right than wrong, and it means a lot for a woman to be understanding that he is working towards the goal, and affirming him, despite the outcome. In a society where there is strong social pressure on men to achieve, it’s pertinent women be emotionally supportive.
(Tim comment ) : The comments mentioned above that tend to be less attractive to men about women, are actually the character traits of women who have unresolved emotional hurt and often the emotional hurt they have experienced has come at the hands of men. For example, women who have difficulty, saying I am sorry, to a man ultimately don’t want to feel vulnerable to men because typically they have done so in the past, and have been hurt.
Questions and answers taken from the Book: Dr Laura Schlessinger The Proper Care And Feeding of Marriage.
Tim and Jennifer and are certified therapists in Tulsa OK. They both are in a committed monogamous relationship and work hard at marriage. They love coaching couples on healthy relationships and communication. If you are interested in couples coaching, please contact us at tim.owensgroup@gmail.com . Although we live in the Tulsa area, we can coach via Skype. we have clients currently in Florida,Texas, Georgia and the Tulsa area.
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